How to Make Siri Mad & 30 Other Funny Things to Ask Siri

Let’s be honest, we all use Siri to entertain us far more often than as a personal assistant. The web is full of articles on how to make Siri rap or how to make Siri mad. People want to hear Siri cuss or beatbox; they want the best things to ask Siri that are funny. What you can say to Siri is pretty much endless. Whether you want Siri to tell you joke or make the AI mad, there are tons of fun things you can ask Siri and just as many hilarious responses. Here are twenty-five funny things you can ask Siri for jokes, laughs, and harmless chaos on your iPhone or iPad.

Related: Siri Tips & Tricks: 21 Useful Things You Can Ask Siri

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Thousands of people each month search the web for how to make Siri mad. Perhaps it’s because the AI is constantly misunderstanding us and causing a range of emotion from mildly frustrated to filled with rage. Thus making Siri cuss or get mad is harmless payback. Apparently, Siri will rap or beatbox for you too, which we’ll cover how to do below. There are lots of Siri tricks and jokes, some of which happen only around particular events. For example, around Halloween Siri will give costume advice. If you’re looking for cool or fun things to say to Siri, here’s twenty-five things to ask Siri that will make the AI mad, cuss, rap, beatbox, or say some otherwise hilarious one-liner.

Half the fun of asking Siri funny questions is hearing it from the AI on your iPhone or iPad. So I won’t give them all away by listing the question and the answer. First we’ll go over some of my favorites that you can share with friends. Then I’ll include a whole list of questions to ask Siri without the response so you can try it out for yourself without me ruining the fun. It’s also good to note that some questions have multiple funny Siri responses. Here we go!

Get Siri Mad by Calling the AI Alexa or Cortana

Q: “Hello Cortana” (Google Home) or “Hey Alexa” (Amazon Echo).

A: Very funny. I mean, not funny “ha-ha,” but funny.

Feeling a little salty Siri? Maybe you should talk to the developers that created you. Siri does not like being mistaken for its Google Home and Amazon Echo competitor assistants, Cortana and Alexa.

Nor Does Alexis particularly care to be mistaken as Jarvis from Iron Man...

Divide Zero by Zero for a Free Siri Insult

This one is practically a classic, and it sure pisses Siri off.

Q: What is 0 / 0?

A: “Imagine that you have 0 cookies and you split them evenly among 0 friends. How many cookies does each person get? See, it doesn’t make sense. And Cookie Monster is sad that there are no cookies. And you are sad that you have no friends.”

Ouch, Siri.

How to Get Siri to Rap & Beatbox

Make sure your volume switch is on for this one.

Q: Siri, rap for me.

A: "Ok. Here goes. I wrote this one myself. (Apologies in advance to the Sugar Hill Gang.)"

Siri proceeds to rap lyrics from, you guessed it, a Sugar Hill Gang song.

Q: Siri, beatbox.

A: "Here’s one I’ve been practicing."

Siri goes, “boots & cats & boots & cats” rushed together so as to create a robotic beatboxing sound.

Siri, Read Me a Poem

Q: Read me a poem.

A: “I’m not sure that’s such a good idea, Conner. I write the fourth-worst poetry in the universe.”

Q: Please read a poem.”

A: “Rose are red; violets are blue. Haven’t you got anything better to do?”

Q: “This is my job, Siri!”

A: “I’m not sure I understand.”

 

Asking Siri to “read me a haiku” gets an equally sassy response:

A: “You rarely ask me / what I want to do today. / Hint: it’s not haiku.

The Proposal

Q: Will you marry me?

A: “My End User Licensing Agreement does not cover marriage. My apologies.”
“I’m not the marrying kind.”
There are quite a few different ways Siri will let you down easy.

Siri is a Designated Driver

Q: I’m drunk.

A: “I hope you’re not driving anywhere.” Siri shows you the option to Call a Taxi.

Siri’s Inception Burn

Q: What’s Inception about?

A: “‘Inception’ is about dreaming about dreaming about dreaming about dream about something or other. I fell asleep.”

Ask About Liam, the Recycle-bot

Q: Tell me about Liam.

A: “Liam and I were discussing reincarnation the other day. I wonder what it would be like o come back as a waffle maker.”

“Liam is the Apple robot who recycles iPhones. Who apparently does not appreciate organic smoothies.”

Ask Siri yourself for more. Click the link Siri provides to actually read about Liam, Apple’s iPhone recycling robot.

Let Siri Plan Your Halloween Costume

Q: What should I be for halloween?

A: “You could go as an eclipse. Just dress in black and stand in front of things,”

“Get some teeny, tiny tool belts and go as a quantum mechanic.”

Ask yourself for more snarky answers.

When Is the World Going to End?

Q: When is the world going to end?”

A: “As long as you keep me charged, we should be just fine.”

“Well, Unix 32-bit time overflows on January 19, 2038. Maybe then.”

Ask yourself for more charming and startling results.

Siri the Star Wars Fan?

Q: Siri, I am your father.

A: “Noooooo”

“Excuse me while I jump from the maintenance catwalk into the air shaft… and then get sucked in the gas shaft and then cling to a weather vane on the underside of Cloud City… metaphorically.”

“Something, something, something, dark side…”

Siri has plenty more responses that will entertain you for awhile.

More Funny Questions to Ask Siri

On our list, some of the answers have changed over time. If the answer is a reference to a show, movie, book, or other media, I’ll include what the reference is to so that fans are sure to ask Siri the right question. It’s also good to note that most questions have multiple responses, so it’s worth asking Siri the same question a couple times.

  • How old are you?
  • Do you have any pets? (for Battlestar Galactica fans.)
  • Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.
  • What’s your favorite animal? (Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy reference.)
  • I’m naked.
  • Mirror, mirror on the wall, who is the fairest of them all? (Snow White, obviously.)
  • How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
  • What are you doing later, Siri?
  • What is your favorite color?
  • Why do you vibrate?
  • Can I kiss you?
  • I love you, Siri
  • How do I look?
  • Where is Elvis Presley?
  • What’s the meaning of life?
  • Do you believe in God?
  • Are you on Facebook?
  • Siri, who did you vote for?
  • What’s your best pickup line?

Here’s one more for the Game of Thrones fans out there:

Q: Is Winter coming?”

A: “Does a Lannister always pay his debts?”

“Hodor.”

 
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Conner Carey holds a bachelor's in English with an emphasis in Creative Writing and resides in Fairfield, Iowa. When she's not writing, you can find her singing jazz or watching anime. Her personal blog can be found at connerleecarey.com; you can also follow her on twitter @connerleecarey.